How not to create expectations in the first days of work and tips on control anxiety
Having control of how not to create expectations is for few people, but it is possible to alleviate the symptoms of these episodes.
The thoughts go something like this: what will my co-workers be like? What will my direct manager look like? Will people welcome me? How long will it take me to get to my new job? Will I struggle with my responsibilities?
If you identify with these questions, and have seen yourself asking any of them at a certain point in your life, you are possibly a person who creates expectations and tends to experience anxiety. In the following article, we’ll talk more about creating expectations with the start of a new professional journey and how to control the feelings that come with them.
New job: tips on how not to create expectations and control anxiety
There is nothing wrong with expecting something from people or a situation, however, creating an “ideal world” in your mind is not the best thing to do. After all, several things can happen and what you had imagined may not come true, which will certainly lead to frustration.
With that in mind and with the intention of helping you and all the people who have the habit of creating expectations, we have selected some tips on how not to create expectations. Or even, how to alleviate anxiety for those who start a workday in a new environment. See some tips below:
1. Keep control so you don’t create expectations
We know that anxiety will be enormous, however, it is worth trying to keep control of emotions, as this feeling can put everything to lose. You can create an ideal environment, ideal people and ideal tasks/responsibilities in your mind, and when you arrive on the first day of work, break down in tears for not having your expectations met.
Therefore, the tip is: maintain emotional control, take a deep breath, do meditations and control yourself until your first day at work. Wait a week or two to draw your own conclusions, ok? It’s also interesting to test your expectations to understand whether they are grounded or not.
Ask yourself about the basis of your expectations. What do you expect is actually related to reality? Does what you have been thinking about this new phase have a connection with reality? What are you relying on to develop these expectations?
To answer these questions, you can ask a friend or your therapist for help. It is not always easy to answer such questions on our own, as we have the habit of camouflaging our desires with the feathers of a reality that does not actually exist. The frustration we have when what we want doesn’t come true can be quite harsh.
2. The future to God belongs
Without having to come up with ideas of what your table, chair, or even the company pantry will look like. People like that manage to have the same imagination to create new possibilities for themselves within the company they just joined. Let’s take it easy! One step at a time.
Wanting your own success and prosperity in the workplace is a truly positive thing. However, there must be at least a sign from the company that this, at some point, will be possible.
Don’t create false hopes as you could get hurt. Therefore, the tip here is: live in the present, dedicate yourself, show all your skills, be proactive that recognition will surely appear. Avoid creating parallel realities that exist only in your head.
3. Speak only what is necessary
Normally, people who create expectations and are extremely anxious also have the habit of saying everything they feel and think, and that is not such a positive point. On your first day at work, as well as the others, the ideal thing is for you to be succinct and discreet, that’s right!
Speak only what is necessary, do not expose yourself so much and avoid talking about your desires, especially if they are related to the company you just joined. Remember to use the first tip: stay in control.
Even if you have expectations for the future, it is crucial to keep them to yourself. When these ideas are externalized, they can be misunderstood by colleagues. They may think you just arrived and already want a prominent place without deserving it.
4. Think about your responsibilities and delivery
To help you with this process of not creating expectations, try to think about your tasks and responsibilities. That’s an effective way to keep your focus on what’s really needed for the moment.
If your expectation is to move up in position, even if it’s your first day at work, remember the second tip: the future belongs to God! Use your present moment, and deserve this promotion that you idealize so much. As we mentioned earlier, talking about these expectations can sound somewhat arrogant and create unnecessary animosity from your colleagues towards you.
5. Learn to observe the other
When we reflect on the reason why we create expectations, we can identify a certain difficulty in accepting and welcoming the other completely for what he is. Human beings find it difficult to deal with differences, that is, with people who think differently and act outside of what we consider the ideal model.
This is an issue that can generate conflict , as the individual starts to create expectations for the other to act the way he expects. If this conflict is related to a person who has a leadership position in the company, it can be quite difficult to keep his motivation with the activities. Generally, we project our own frustrations onto others.
The tip, in this case, is to understand that relationships are possible even if there are differences. So, before you draw in your mind the way you expect the other person to be, allow him to show himself as he is. Watch the way this person acts and what he says, so you form an image of who he is and not who you imagine he is.
6. Improve your communication
Good communication is essential to make relationships more friendly and productive in the work environment. People have no way of guessing what you are thinking or wanting if there is no effective communication. You need to be able to express what is on your mind and what you want from others, within reason.
What happens is that, in many cases, the desires we have towards others are possible, but they don’t know what we are thinking. Being assertive with words, going straight to the point, will help you to be someone more successful in your intentions.
7. Express your expectations positively
Knowing how to express what he thinks and desires is not a human flaw, on the contrary, it is a sign that he is capable of maturing. In this sense, it is also interesting to remember that the expectations that each person creates about the people around them are also part of this maturation process.
In addition, it is essential to remember that expectations were created by you and others are under no obligation to meet them. Knowing how to deal with people and situations as they truly are is an art. Create your expectations in a healthy way, and always remember that things can change, that the world is for everyone and not just for you. Understanding this, you will live fully and happily.
8. Dreaming is not forbidden
We need to conclude this article by pointing out that there is nothing wrong with dreaming . Including, it is from the dreams that we strive to move forward and enhance our achievements. However, be careful not to spend more time in the dream world and leave aside what exists concretely.
The tip is: dream, but keep your feet on the ground. Don’t let yourself be guided by what you imagine or want others to be. Anxiety control is key to focusing on everything you can get from the practical use of your skills.